When we moved to Queenstown i was off birth control for quite a few months. However i wouldn’t say that we were “trying” for a baby. I had been on the contraceptive pill since i was 14 years old for skin related and hormonal issues. With my periods being so irregular and inconsistent lengths of time (sometimes up to a whole month) I knew that if i was hoping to get pregnant in the near future getting off it and allowing my body to return to it’s natural cycle was going to be the best idea.
We never sat down and said “ok lets get off birth control and try for a baby” at all! It sort of just happened that way. I went off birth control and it took at the very least 6 months for my body to return to it’s natural cycle. Once it did, it had been about a year all up before we found out we were pregnant. Keep in mind this was having no idea of when i was ovulating or really “trying” for a baby at all.
Even though during this time it had always been a possibility and we would have been happy if it did. We were very happy with the situation we were in, adjusting to moving cities and new career opportunities. I guess, it didn’t quite feel as though it was the “perfect” time to have a baby.
Which brings me to the question i have most definitely answered for myself now…When is the right time to have a baby?
For the past 2-3 years, after we got our first baby (our mini schnauzer Harvey) I think I knew i really wanted a baby. I was so clucky around other people’s babies and found myself watching mum vlogs, blogs and my instagram feed was quickly filling up with baby stores and inspiring Mum accounts. Although deep down i knew, i couldn’t quite admit it to myself or family and friends. I think this was due to the fact that i hadn’t ticked off the list in my head.
THE LIST: THINGS THAT MUST BE DONE BEFORE YOU HAVE A BABY OR YOU WILL NOT BE A SUCCESS
- Must be at the pinnacle of my career
- Be at my goal weight (what i weighed in highschool) ha
- Be engaged, preferably married
- Have bought a second house
- Travelled the world
- Really the list could go on……
After being with Sam for 9 years i obviously knew i wanted to start a family with him but i couldn’t get over all of these things. By the time i had ticked most of these to do’s off, i would most likely be infertile or possibly struggle with infertility which is so common now. I do believe that to put starting a family ahead of your own career is almost frowned upon within society.
Since becoming pregnant none of those “must do’s” now have as much relevance. Yes they would be nice and i would feel more secure, but who said we can’t achieve these together as a team with a baby? I’ve definitely realised that we are a team and in order for us to achieve those goals sacrifices have to be made by both of us.
I’m so happy that we are in the situation that we are in now and wouldn’t change it for a thing. It is daunting, crazy, bonkers, but SO exciting that we will have our own little human in only 12 weeks time.
So the answer to the question; When is the right time to have a baby?
My answer is there is never a “perfect” time….until you do.